I was visiting my parents in Palm Desert, California this past week for my father’s 90th birthday (and my mother’s 88th!). As I drove back to Arizona, watching the desert landscape roll by, I couldn’t stop thinking about how in love they still are and how, even at their age, they find things they love to do and that give them purpose.
It got me thinking about how having a sense of purpose isn’t just a nice-to-have – it’s absolutely crucial for living a resilient life. When we have purpose, we have a reason to bounce back from setbacks, to keep moving forward even when things get tough.
My parents are living proof of this. Up until just a year or so ago, my mom was still volunteering at the center for the blind, even as she started facing her own health challenges. And my father, a retired doctor, continued to volunteer at a local free medical clinic well into his late 80s.
Have you ever wondered what keeps people going, even in the face of challenges or advancing age? What gives them that spark, that reason to get up every morning with a smile?
Finding and maintaining a sense of purpose is like having an internal compass. It guides our decisions, gives meaning to our actions, and provides the motivation to keep going when life throws curveballs our way. In other words, it’s a key ingredient in the recipe for resilience.
Here are three strategies I’ve observed in my parents that we can all learn from:
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Continuous Learning:
My parents never stop seeking new knowledge. My Dad, at 90, still reads medical journals to stay updated on the latest advancements. My Mom took up watercolor painting in her 70s. They’ve shown me that learning isn’t just for the young – it’s a lifelong journey that keeps our minds sharp and our spirits engaged.
What’s something new you’ve always wanted to learn? Maybe it’s time to sign up for that cooking class or start learning a new language online.
Here is a worksheet you can download to get you started!
​Curiosity Compass: Your Personal Learning Adventure Worksheet​
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Giving Back:
Both my parents found immense satisfaction in volunteering. It wasn’t about grand gestures, but about consistently showing up and making a difference in their community. My Mothers’s work at the Center for the Blind gave her a sense of purpose that went beyond her own challenges.
Is there a cause close to your heart? Consider dedicating even just an hour a week to volunteering. It could be at a local animal shelter, a food bank, or even offering to tutor a neighbor’s child.
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Nurturing Relationships:
The love between my parents after all these years is truly inspiring. They prioritize their relationship but also maintain strong connections with friends and family. These relationships provide support, joy, and a sense of belonging.
Who in your life haven’t you connected with in a while? Why not reach out to an old friend or family member this week? A simple phone call or message can reignite a meaningful connection.
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Bach Flower Wisdom:
You know, there’s a Bach Flower Remedy called Wild Oat that can be particularly helpful when you’re feeling unsure of your direction in life. It supports clarity and decision-making when you’re exploring your purpose.
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This week, I challenge you to take one small step towards connecting with your purpose.
I’m curious, if you had an extra hour each day, how would you spend it to feel more fulfilled? Just reply to this email to share!

Have you ever caught yourself obsessing over a tiny detail, convinced that everything must be flawless?
I certainly have. I can remember spending hours agonizing over a presentation, tweaking every slide until the wee hours of the morning. Blearily eyed I’d stare at my computer screen, head in my hands, asking ”Why am I doing this to myself!”
Was this pursuit of perfection serving me, or holding me back? (that’s rhetorical, it wasn’t serving me!)
Recalling this moment of clarity got me thinking about how often we, as high-achieving women, fall into the perfection trap, and the impact it has on our resilience.
Perfectionism isn’t just about high standards; it’s a double-edged sword that can both drive us and drain us. While striving for excellence can lead to great achievements, unchecked perfectionism can be a major obstacle to our well-being and resilience.
I recently worked with a client, let’s call her Emma, who was facing this struggle. A successful business owner and mother of three, Emma prided herself on her meticulous attention to detail. “If it’s not perfect, it’s not worth doing,” she often said.
I get it, I have often thought that way. But I have learned to change my self-talk to “If it is worth doing, it’s worth doing poorly!” And I can tell you, it has been a game changer. Look, my “doing it poorly” isn’t shoddy, but it is a rung down from “driving myself (and maybe others around me) crazy”.
I shared this with Emma and it helped her recognize that her mindset, and mantra, were keeping her in a constant state of stress, unable to delegate, and missing out on precious moments with her family.
Does this resonate with you? Have you ever felt paralyzed by the fear of not meeting your own impossibly high standards?
Overcoming perfectionism isn’t about lowering your standards; it’s about redefining success and building resilience. By learning to embrace imperfection, we open ourselves up to growth, creativity, and a more balanced life.
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Here are a couple of strategies Emma and I worked on together:
The "Good Enough" Challenge:
We established a daily practice of intentionally doing one task at 80% effort. This helped Emma learn that the world doesn’t fall apart when things aren’t perfect.
For instance, Emma decided to send an email without obsessively proofreading it five times. To her surprise, not only did the recipient understand the message perfectly, but Emma also gained back valuable time in her day.
Does this ring true for you? If so I encourage you to try this as well.
Choose one task today and deliberately aim for “good enough” instead of perfect. Notice how it feels and what you gain from it.
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Reframing “Mistakes” as “Learning Opportunities”: Emma started keeping a “Growth Journal” where she recorded things that didn’t go as planned and what she learned from them.
One entry read: “Presentation glitch - slide transition didn’t work. Learned to always have a backup plan and that I can think on my feet.”
This practice helped Emma see that imperfections often lead to valuable insights and personal growth.
How might your life change if you started celebrating your imperfections instead of hiding them?
Here is a downloadable PDF that can help you track “Good Enough” as well as “Mistake Moments” and what you learned from them. Keep it simple and try it for ONLY 1 or 2 days.
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Bach Flower Wisdom
Rock Water​Flower essences are a natural and safe way to heal unwanted thoughts, feelings, and concerns. The remedy Rock Water can be especially helpful for those struggling with perfectionism. It supports flexibility and self-acceptance, helping to soften rigid expectations of oneself.
This week, I challenge you to embrace one imperfection each day. Start small - maybe leave a dish in the sink overnight or wear mismatched socks. Notice how it feels to let go of that need for perfection.
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I’m curious, what are your thoughts? What’s one area where you tend to be overly perfectionist? How might embracing imperfection in this area free up your energy and time?
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Warmly,

Last week, I found myself staring at my to-do list, filled with tasks for everyone but me. It hit me: when was the last time I asked myself, “What do I want?” This simple question felt almost foreign, yet incredibly powerful.
This experience got me thinking about how often we, as women, put ourselves last. It’s time we talked about the importance of self-consideration as a resilience strategy.
The concept of asking “What do I want?” is more than just self-indulgence; it’s a crucial aspect of self-awareness and personal growth. Yet, for many of us, it’s a question we struggle to answer.
Hannah is a client I work with who epitomizes this struggle. A successful executive and mother of two, Hannah realized she couldn’t remember the last time she made a decision purely for herself. “I feel like I’ve lost touch with my own desires,” she confessed. “Everything I do is for my family or my team at work. I don’t even know where to start with what I want.”
Does this resonate with you? When was the last time you made a decision based solely on your own wants and needs? Or maybe you do put yourself first but find it’s not always easy.
Asking yourself “What do I want?” is not selfish; it’s a powerful act of self-care and a key to building resilience. By reconnecting with our own desires and needs, we refuel ourselves, enabling us to better handle life’s challenges and continue supporting others.
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Here are a couple of strategies Hannah and I worked on together:
Daily Desire Check-In: We established a daily practice of asking “What do I want?” in different areas of life. Hannah started with simple choices like “What do I want for breakfast?” She laughed because the question seemed so simple, yet she had given in to eating the pancakes her kids always asked for, which wasn’t her “choice”. Gradually she moved to bigger questions. This helped her reconnect with her preferences and desires.
For example, Hannah realized she wanted to start her mornings with a quiet cup of tea instead of frantically standing by the counter eating the rest of her son’s breakfast. Getting up earlier to do this when the house was still quiet significantly improved her mood and energy throughout the day.
Why not try this yourself? Start your day by asking “What do I want from today?” and see how it shifts your perspective.
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The ‘Me’ List: Hannah created a list of things she wanted just for herself, ranging from small indulgences to bigger life goals. She revisited and updated this list regularly, using it as a reminder of her personal aspirations.
One item on Hannah’s list was learning to paint. So she signed up for a weekly art class, something she had wanted to do for years but never prioritized. Here is a PDF to create your own 'Me' list.​
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Bach Flower Wisdom
CeratoIn terms of Bach flower remedies, Cerato can be particularly helpful for those who have a hard time tuning in to their inner voice. It can help you trust your own judgment instead of asking others for advice.
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This week, I challenge you to ask yourself “What do I want?” at least once a day. Start with small decisions and see how it feels to prioritize your own desires.
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I’d love to hear from you. What’s one thing you want just for yourself? How does it feel to acknowledge this want?

Last week, I found myself at a friend’s birthday party, surrounded by the excited chatter of her college-bound daughter and friends. Their mix of anticipation and anxiety about moving to a new town without their usual support system struck a chord. It took me right back to my own life transitions - not just college, but every major leap I’ve taken!
Remember that feeling? The butterflies in your stomach when you started a new job, became a mother, or watched your last child leave the nest? Each of these moments forced me to rebuild my social circle.
When I started my chiropractic practice, I found a connection with fellow women healthcare practitioners. The transition to motherhood pushed me to meet new moms sharing my experience. When the transition was a difficult one, like when I was recovering from mold illness and unable to go out much, I recreated my social circle by joining online communities and taking online classes.
The conversation with these young women got me thinking about how cultivating a strong support network is like tending a resilience garden. It’s not just about having people around; it’s about nurturing relationships that help us weather life’s storms and celebrate its sunshine.
Here’s something fascinating: research shows that a robust support system does more than just make us feel good. It can actually lower our stress levels, boost our immune system, and even extend our lifespan. Social support isn’t just a nice-to-have, it’s a must-have for our resilience!
In my work, I’ve noticed that a thriving support network usually includes three types of amazing individuals:
Emotional Cheerleaders: These are your go-to people for a good cry or a hearty laugh. They’re the ones who remind you of your strength when you’ve forgotten.
Practical Helpers: These are your real-world problem solvers. When life throws curveballs, they offer tangible solutions, transforming overwhelming situations into manageable tasks.
Wisdom-Sharers: These are your personal council of elders. They’ve navigated life’s labyrinth and emerged with hard-won insights and can offer perspective.
Recognizing these different types of support can help us build a more balanced and effective support network. So, how can we nurture these vital connections?
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Here are three strategies I’ve found particularly helpful:
Support Mapping: I created a visual map of my support network, identifying different types of support - emotional cheerleaders, practical helpers, and wisdom-sharers. It was eye-opening for me to see where I felt supported and where I still had gaps! Why not try this yourself? You can use this downloadable worksheet to start mapping out your own support network. You might be surprised by what you discover.
Strategic Asking: I noticed I often hesitated to ask for help, worried that I would be encroaching. So, I practiced specific ways to reach out, matching my needs with the right supporters. For instance, I initiated regular check-ins with a mentor for professional guidance and set up a “skill-swap” with a neighbor - I offer flower essence consultations in exchange for their graphic design help.
Reciprocity Rituals: I set up small, consistent ways to give back to my support network. This helped me feel more balanced in my relationships. One ritual I love is my “Friday Gratitude” practice, where I send a heartfelt message - it might even be via text, to someone who’s supported me that week.
What’s one small way you could strengthen a connection in your support network this week?
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Bach Flower Wisdom
​Bach flower remedies can be wonderful allies in this process.
Water VioletFor instance, Water Violet can help if you’re feeling isolated and finding it difficult to connect with others, and Chicory can assist in nurturing healthy, reciprocal relationships, helping us give and receive support with grace.
My challenge for you this week? Reach out to someone in your network - maybe someone you haven’t connected with in a while. A quick call, text, or coffee date can work wonders in nurturing these vital connections.
I’d love to hear about your support circle. Who are they and what’s one small gesture of support you’ve received that had a big impact on you?​​

My time living in a tent healing from mold illness taught me valuable lessons about resilience and hidden struggles. It also made me wonder: how often do we navigate life's complexities while making it look effortless to others?
I bet you've had moments like that too; when you feel like you're drowning while everyone else thinks you're walking on water.
That's what I call invisible overwhelm, and it's a common theme I hear from many of my clients.
Last week, I talked with a client (let's call her Sarah). On paper, Sarah's life looked picture-perfect: successful career, loving family, active in her community. But as we sat down for our session, the facade collapsed.
"I'm drowning," Sarah whispered, her voice barely audible. "No one can see it, but I'm suffocating under the weight of it all. Everyone keeps telling me how amazing I am for managing everything, but if I let go for even a second, it all crumbles."
Sound familiar? It's that state where we're juggling a million plates, looking cool on the outside, but feeling like a pressure cooker about to explode on the inside. And the kicker? We get so good at it that sometimes even we don't realize how heavy that invisible cape has become.
Here's the thing - recognizing this hidden overwhelm is crucial. It reminds me of my experience with mold in our house - at first, it was invisible, but its impact was very real. Similarly, if we don't acknowledge and address our invisible overwhelm, it can lead to burnout. And recovering from burnout? That's a challenging journey I'd rather help you avoid.
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So, what do we do about it? Well, here are three strategies Sarah and I worked on together:
1. The Overwhelm Inventory:
I asked Sarah to keep a simple “log”, to start to shine a light on those moments when she felt like she was juggling too much. I invite you to do the same. Jot down the times when you feel stretched thin - it might surprise you.For example, Sarah's first entry read: "Tuesday, 4pm: Tried to answer an urgent work email while helping kids with homework. Made mistakes on both, then felt rushed prepping dinner because I had to correct things.”By tracking these moments, you'll start to see patterns. Maybe it's always around 3 PM, or perhaps it's when you're trying to multitask. Give it a try this week - just a quick note when you feel overwhelmed.
Here’s a personal “Overwhelm Inventory Log“ to keep track. You might be amazed at what you discover about your daily rhythms and triggers.
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2. Flower Power Breaks:
Sarah committed to taking 2-minute breather breaks between tasks, using her custom Bach flower remedy for instant calm. You can do this too! That Bach flower blend we created for you - why not keep it on your desk or in your bag? When the pressure starts to build, take a pause. A few drops of your remedy (especially if it includes Elm, which is fantastic for that overwhelmed feeling), a deep breath, and you might just find your center again. It's amazing how these tiny moments can shift your entire day.
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3. Voice the Invisible:
You know that feeling when the weight of everything is on your shoulders, but you're afraid to say anything? Sarah felt that too. During our session, we practiced how to speak up. It was tough at first, but when she finally said, "Guys, I'm drowning here. Can we divvy up some of these household tasks?" at her family meeting, it was like a weight lifted. They created a chore chart together, and Sarah felt heard for the first time in ages.
What's one thing you've been silently carrying that you could share with someone this week?
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Remember how those Bach flower remedies got me through my tent days? They taught me that small, consistent actions can be powerful. These strategies work the same way - simple steps that can bring more calm to your day.
So, here's my challenge to you this week: try on one of these strategies. See how it feels. And remember, even superheroes need to take off their capes sometimes.
I'd love to hear your thoughts. Does Sarah's story resonate with you? How do you navigate your own invisible overwhelm?
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Here's to making the invisible, visible - and manageable,
Warmly,
​Elissa

Remember those flower remedies we explored? I never told you but they became my lifeline when the universe gave me a crash course in resilience.
Here's what happened...
It's 2020, and I'm living in a tent in my backyard. No, not a glamping adventure – it was my radical solution to severe mold illness from our water-damaged home. There I was, a doctor treating patients by day and a mom helping with high school geometry by night, all while trying to heal in a tent beneath the stars.
Sounds crazy, right? But here's the thing – this unexpected detour taught me more about resilience than any textbook ever could. I had to dig deep and find new ways to adapt. One of my unlikely allies? The Bach Flower remedies we've talked about before. They became a healthy habit, helping me face each day with a bit more courage and a lot more hope.
This wild ride got me thinking about you. About all of us, really. How we're all navigating our own storms, often silently.
It's why I'm starting something new – a weekly note I'm calling the Resiliency Retreat. It's less about dramatic turnarounds and more about small, meaningful shifts.
Each week, I'll share a bit of what I've learned – about flower essences, and stories about bouncing back and finding strength in the most unlikely places. I’ll share practical tips for resilience and include a downloadable worksheet so you can put these new strategies into practice.
And I look forward to hearing from you! What aspect of resilience do you find most challenging? Is it bouncing back from setbacks, staying positive, or something else entirely?
I'd love for you to join me on this journey. No tents required, I promise.
Warmly,